As a romance author, people are always asking me why I write them. I always turn the tables and ask, “Well, why do you read them?” Over the years I’ve gotten a mixture of responses to this and I’ll share some with you here.
Most readers of romance and erotic romance say they read these novels because they’re lonely, not satisfied in their current sex lives, or simply enjoy being swept away by the stories and hot sex. Who wouldn't swoon over a sexy cowboy with a sarcastic streak like Raif Manning in my novel Cowboys Make Better Lovers? Or drool over the sleepy-eyed sex machine Trevor Scott and his "buffed up beefcake bod" in Best Friends Better Lovers? Let’s face it, the characters in these novels are buffed, built, curvy and courageous. They have lives we could only dream about and sex lives that go beyond our fantasies. It’s a guilty pleasure. A titillating past time.
Can romance novels warp our way of viewing real relationships and real sex lives though? This depends on a few factors. Most people, such as myself, read them for nothing more than entertainment. And, since I write them too, I like keeping abreast of what’s out there. Some women write and tell me that it helps to get them in the mood for sex with their partner. Sort of like foreplay. Guys are usually faster than girls!
But there are people who think that their partner should be like the heroes in these books. They should work at a high-paying high-profile job, romance them until they’re in a puddle at his feet, then bring them to an earth-shattering orgasm every night of the week. They should also dress as if they stepped off the cover of GQ magazine and have a six-pack—on his stomach, not in his hand. Yes, there are women who actually feel this way.
Like any decadent treat, romance novels should be enjoyed and savored, but shouldn’t take the place of a real and healthy relationship.
Getting back to the subject title, is there something we can learn from romance novels? Sure! The characters always seem to grow as individuals and so should we. Don’t remain stuck in your past, don’t set dreams aside, be independent, be confident, take care of yourself, initiate sex more often, and be honest with your feelings—with your partner and yourself.
Life may not be a romance novel, but it can be even better since your life and your partner are real.
Thanks for stopping by!
May your dreams be sexy and your life sensational!
Kelly
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